A short story about an old shepherd

What would you have seen had you been there when the child was born? I imagine one of the shepherds couldn’t be in the fields with the others that night. This is his story.

He was in town when Joseph and Mary arrived. He was an older fellow. His name was Thomas, and he was in town that night because he was hurt.

He stepped on a rock out in the field and twisted his ankle. He didn’t think he’d broken anything, but it swelled up and he could hardly walk.

When it happened he told the others that he was fine. “Let me rest here for a bit. Let me get my breath,and I’ll catch up. You all go on. I’ll catch up.”

“No, old man," said one of the younger guys lovingly. “I’ll take you back to town. You need to get off of that ankle or it’ll never heal. A few days off your feet and you’ll be good as new.”

Thomas wanted to argue, but he was old enough to know better. They wanted him to rest because they cared. They were right.

“Alright, help me down the hill.”

The young shepherd stood straight and strong and Thomas put his arm around his shoulders and together they hobbled back to Bethlehem.

“I heard the inn is full tonight,” said the young shepherd. 

“That’s alright," said Thomas, "I can't afford it anyway. Help me to the stable out back. I know a spot where I can bed down and rest.”

It’s come to this, thought Thomas to himself, as he leaned against the outside wall of the stable and lowered himself to sitting. If I can’t work anymore who will I be, what will I do, what will I be worth?

Here I am with a busted leg and nothing much to show for all my years of roaming these hills tending sheep.

Just as that thought rose in his mind then whispered off into the night Thomas saw a couple walking toward the stable. They both looked young to Thomas, very young. As they passed under a lantern hanging on a post the firelight hit the young woman’s forehead, and Thomas could see she was glistening with sweat. Then he noticed the swell of her stomach. She’s pregnant, he thought, and the baby’s coming soon.

Her husband had a little satchel on his back and a small skin for water that looked to be all but dry. God almighty, Thomas thought to himself, these two don’t have a thing in the world except the baby in that girl’s belly. And no room in the inn in this little town of Bethlehem. Bless their hearts, thought Thomas, God be with them. As they passed by him to enter the stable the woman stopped and looked down at Thomas where he sat.

She said gently, “Are you okay, sir?”

“Yes, said Thomas hesitantly, "Are you? Looks to me like, well, the two of you are about to be three.”

“My name is Mary,” said the girl. She smiled through the pain. “This is Joseph. Will we bother you if we’re in here?” She looked through the doorway into a corner of the stable where a manger sat empty.

Thomas couldn’t breathe for a second. He didn’t know why, his breath just caught in his throat. And then tears welled up in his eyes. He didn’t know why. What is wrong with you old man? he thought to himself.

Then a fullness suddenly welled up in his heart like he’d never felt before. For a second he thought he might be dying.

Mary looked back at him for an answer to her question. Later Thomas said, “Her eyes were an abyss of endless love.”

"You bother me?” stammered Thomas, “No, no, how could you ever bother me?” Umm I’m Thomas, I watch sheep.” Why did I just say that? he thought.

“Well, Thomas," said Mary, "can you watch that no sheep come in here tonight? Our baby’s coming soon."

Thomas felt like he was 10 years old and he’d just been given the most important job in the world. He didn’t know why he felt this way.

“Yes, Mary. Don’t you worry. I’ll keep watch.”

And with that Mary and Joseph went inside.

Thomas said a prayer, “God, these two babies are having a baby and they’ve got nothing at all. Come be with them. Amen.”

After a short while Thomas heard Mary cry out as the pains of childbirth took hold of her. There was a strength in her cries that touched Thomas in his bones. Thomas closed his eyes and prayed hard for Mary.

It wasn’t long before he heard the baby cry. Thomas whispered to himself and to God above, “Good job momma. Good job and thank you God.”

After the baby quieted down there was silence for a little while. Thomas thought it was the deepest silence he’d ever heard, it struck him that it might as well be the silence out of which all creation had sprung. He wanted to stay wrapped in the silence forever. Then Thomas heard Mary’s voice call his name.

“Thomas? Are you there?”

“Yes, Mary, I’m here.”

“Thomas will come see our baby?”

“Yes, Mary.”

Thomas struggled to his feet and limped into the stable. Thomas thought Mary was glowing like she was the source of all the life in the universe. Her smile was an infinity of softness and light. The baby was wrapped in bands of cloth and cradled in Mary’s arms. Joseph stood beside them.

“Thomas, this is Jesus,” said Mary. "Thank you for keeping watch.”

Thomas looked at the baby Jesus and he felt every cell in his body flood with love. He fell to his knees and tears poured from his eyes. He was totally out of control. As he fell the pain in his ankle arced like a lightning strike. When his knees hit the dirt floor of the stable he looked up at Mary and the baby and something happened.

In the endless depth of her eyes Thomas saw everyone he’d ever loved, his parents, his little brother, his sisters, the boys: his motley shepherd crew, and the girl he loved and lost in his youth. All of them appeared in a great glow of warmth and his whole body shuddered as a vast deep love overwhelmed him.

Thomas knew in an instant that though his pockets were empty, his hands were bare, and his body had done the last of its work he had it all….

He belonged to this Holy Family whoever on earth they were.

This couple had nothing, nothing at all, and yet they had everything.

And now Thomas did too. He loved this child and in his heart he knew this child loved him.

Why? He didn’t know why, but it didn’t matter.

Thomas heard something move behind him. He turned and saw his friends standing in the doorway.

“Thomas?" said one of the shepherds, "We saw an angel.”

The shepherd's voice trembled. “Thomas, is there a baby here?”

“Come on in here boys. Come softly now.” said Thomas, “The baby is here, He’s here. There’s a family in this place. They are just like us, they don’t have a penny to their name and they are the richest people I ever knew. They have nothing and yet they have everything. They have a love that will wreck you. Don’t try to understand it boys, just kneel and breathe it in. It’s love that led you here and this child is the One we’ve been waiting for boys. Can you believe it? He’s here and his name is Jesus.”